– make kids feel inadequate
– encourages competitiveness (too much causing either vanity or bitterness)
– affects them till adulthood
In anger or with pleasure, whatever you want to tell this child can be said directly, without any reference to his brother. The keyword is describe.
Describe what you see
I see a brand new jacket on the floor
Describe how you feel
that bothers me
Describe what needs to be done
this jacket belongs in the closet
The important thing is to stick with the issue of this child’s behaviour. Nothing his brother is or isn’t doing has anything to do with him.
“It’s a good idea to save our enthusiastic comments for the ear of the deserving child”
Siblings without rivalry by Adele Faber, Elaine Mazlish