The perils of comparison

Comparisons:
– make kids feel inadequate
– encourages competitiveness (too much causing either vanity or bitterness)
– affects them till adulthood

Therefore,

In anger or with pleasure, whatever you want to tell this child can be said directly, without any reference to his brother. The keyword is describe.

Describe what you see
I see a brand new jacket on the floor

Describe how you feel
that bothers me

Describe what needs to be done
this jacket belongs in the closet

The important thing is to stick with the issue of this child’s behaviour. Nothing his brother is or isn’t doing has anything to do with him.

“It’s a good idea to save our enthusiastic comments for the ear of the deserving child”

Siblings without rivalry by Adele Faber, Elaine Mazlish

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About Lili

Lili is a wife, mum, blogger, and aspiring author. She is a strong believer that we are IN CONTROL of the type of life we’re living, the type of person we are and the one we grow to be. Her goal is to help you become the person you want to be & have the life you deserve! Join her at www.lilisr.com
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